Why Most People Never Create Life on "Their Own Terms"
Your Biggest Vision
Season 2, Ep. 40
Close your eyes. Imagine your dream life. Where are you? Who are you with? What are you wearing? Now open your eyes and ask yourself, why can’t those things be mine? The truth is, most people will never actually create life on their own terms which leaves them stuck living a life that was created for them, based on values and beliefs created by others. In this episode, I dive into the neurological and psychological reasons as to why you may not be living your dream life.
Tune in to hear:
- The number one reason why people don’t create the life they love.
- How to rewire your brain in order to set yourself free!
- The number one reason why I think businesses fail.
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Leah Gervais: Welcome everyone. Today, we are going to talk about the number one reason. Most people never #createthelifetheylove. So if you’ve been on the internet for like three seconds, then you probably have seen on Pinterest on Instagram, on really any social media, the trend and the craze around helping people create life that they love. And this can really be done in any way. I think it’s probably very common in entrepreneurship, but it can be done, um, through your career. It can just be done through personal development, through therapy. There’s a lot of different types of angles. People can create with this as the bottom line and as the meaning, which is that they can help you create life on your own terms or life that you love. And I know for myself, this was very appealing to me.
When I started my business, this was a huge motivator to me. It really spoke to me. It was really clear to me that that’s exactly what I wanted to do. And he just graduated college and I was working as a paralegal and I was on track to go to law school and it was realizing really quickly and really clearly that it wasn’t the path I wanted to go down. I didn’t love the legal profession. I didn’t think it was for me. I didn’t love being in a cubicle. I loved being in New York city, but I wasn’t really getting to experience New York city because, um, I didn’t have the money. I was working as a paralegal with student loans and I was living in one of the most expensive cities in the world by choice. But that was the reality. And the path that I was looking at going to law school would have been more lucrative, but the trade off would have been my time.
I worked at a law firm, so I saw how much the lawyers worked. I also was then dating now married to a corporate attorney. So he was working at a really big law firm and working quite a bit. So I was seeing very clearly that, you know, in the situation I was in, I was not getting to experience my life or New York, the way that I really wanted, because I didn’t have enough money to do so. Um, and I didn’t really love the career I was in. It was fine, but it didn’t love it. And then on the reverse side, when people were making more money, a lot of the times they didn’t have the time to enjoy it. And so when I started hearing the possibility that I could create life on my own terms, that really excited me, and it just, it just clicked right away.
I was like that, that is what I want. And I’m just so happy people are talking about it because I have almost been led to believe that, you know, a life where you could have both money and time isn’t plausible, isn’t feasible is asking for too much, you know, because a lot of our parents didn’t didn’t really require that they were just happy that they have one or the other, frankly let alone both. So it was a really immediate attraction to me. And I am very proud of the life that I’ve created over the past few years since deciding that that was going to be the bottom line. Uh, I can confidently tell you that you can have both money and time to enjoy your life, but there was a whole requirement of what it actually means to create life on your own terms and a life that you love that I have gone through that.
I had no idea I was going to go through when I started. I don’t think it’s talked enough. And honestly, it’s not that I think people are trying to keep it a secret or that people are, um, you know, not wanting to share it. It’s that. I still think a lot of people don’t really understand it. And that’s why there are a lot of people out there who are on journeys of the road, less traveled and really struggling. That’s why a lot of entrepreneurs suffer with a lot of anxiety and stress. That’s why a lot of businesses fail. I honestly think that what I’m about to share with you is the number one reason that businesses fail. It’s why a lot of people don’t follow through with the things they want to do. It’s, it’s sort of this like entry level barrier concept that can lead you to having freedom on your terms, money on your terms, career, on your terms, dating on your terms, living on your terms, all those sort of external things we see when we get excited about creating the life we love, we don’t really see what really has to go on inside, in order for that to happen.
So the way I want to start this is by, uh, establishing those of you who know me have probably heard me talk a lot about, but it might be new to some others of you, which is one of the universal laws called the law of polarity. And before you turn this off, because you think it sounds too woo woo, just bear with me. It’s very, very logical, basically this universal law States that for everything, for everything that exists there exists an opposite. And we absolutely know this to be true in our day to day life. We would not experience heat if we did not experience cold, you’ll hear from your parents that you have to go through the hard times in order to experience the good times. Because without that contrast, we wouldn’t know what good is because we wouldn’t have anything to compare it to that would be negative.
It really is just how our day to day life goes. And so the same is true with wanting to start something new in your life, wanting to bring something new in your life, wanting to do something different in your life. If you want to start doing something one way, you have to understand and be aware of the fact that it could mean giving up or needing to accept an opposite way to do this. So let me give you a very practical example. Money, let’s use money. Money is always a popular thing to talk about. So when we hear people say that they want to leave the corporate world and leave the nine to five job life so that they can create life on their own terms. And a big attraction to that is that they want to have more financial options, I guess I should say they don’t want to have an income ceiling the way, uh, you know, typical pay jobs do.
They don’t want to have an exact limit to how much they can be making every two weeks. Things like that. They love the idea of it being completely free, it being completely in their control and it being completely, um, unrelated or unrestricted. Great. So if that is something you want to bring into your, just kind of try to picture, like on the one hand, you have this new way of thinking about finances, of receiving finances and of allowing money. Then according to the universe we live in, you therefore will step into the opposite, which is new ways of losing money, new ways of spending money, new ways of experiencing money that you might not totally love. And just bear with me because I’m not telling you that you need to experience all the bad, but it’s just this awareness. So you don’t want to have a paycheck every two weeks, great.
You want to have a paycheck all the time. So you start doing things that get you paid every day, let’s say, or every week, we’ll start with that. Well, then you step into the realm of possibility where you get paid once a month, once a year, significantly less than two times a week. And this is where people freak out, shut down and never actually follow through with themselves. They can’t take the opposite potential or possibility that comes with the new potential or new level that they want to manifest. Now, I’m not saying that there is any one specific way that you should or shouldn’t want to receive money. And you do get to do this in a way that you design, but you have to understand how to get there and how to get there means actually letting go of where you currently are.
So if you’re still attached to making money in the way that you did in the past, then you’re not going to ever change it. And you know, when we look at the reality here, okay, let’s take making a paycheck every two weeks versus getting a paycheck every day versus getting a paycheck once every six months, there is nothing universally good, bad, ugly, unhealthy, excellent about any of that, it is all neutral. It’s just data. It’s just numbers, right? There’s nothing. We as humans don’t need to make money every two weeks in order to survive at all right. Probably the richest people in the world don’t get paychecks ever. They just have like investments coming in all the time. And then people that have far less, you know, don’t have as much money coming in at all. So there is nothing inherently good or bad about how frequently you make money.
We attach meaning to it. We attach worth to it. We attach judgment to what we think is safe and what we think is secure. And if you can’t actually break down those judgements and break down these meanings and these, these reasons for why you experienced something the way you do, you will never create life on your own terms, because those terms are someone else’s terms. Those terms are society’s terms. Those terms are terms you grew up with. Those terms are terms that you’re the fear in your head saying I’m going to run out of money and never be able to survive. That’s their terms. Those aren’t your terms. You get to decide, do I actually need to make money every two weeks or actually do I not? But if you were just holding onto it by default, because you’re not actually trying to reverse engineer the way you thought, or, you know, the way you were brought up, then you’re never going to detach from what you know, to be true and create life and your own set of truths.
And this is what most people are afraid to do, or what most people don’t know they need to do, or what most people honestly are too lazy to do. And it’s painful stuff, but here’s why, and here’s why it’s painful. Here’s the next thing that you need to know. When I say that we attach meaning to everything, we attach meaning to failure, right? Failure is subjective to like, God’s not coming down from the heavens telling you, you failed. You tell yourself that you fail. God is also not coming down from the heavens telling you, you need to get paid every two weeks. You tell yourself you need to get paid every two weeks. And so where do these, where do these meanings come from? Where do we get this worth from? Well, our subconscious mind and where does our subconscious mind get programmed from? Our childhood.
Our subconscious mind is programmed from our parents. Programmed from, are the elders that we grew up with aside from our parents, uh, are the religions that we grew up with, um, fears that were in our life as a child and, uh, society, you know, and the community and the environment in which we grew up in and so we are molded. Our minds are molded at a very young age to think a certain way, and to perceive the world a certain way and to value things like believe it or not a paycheck every two weeks at a very young age. So here we are, we’re adults, we’re scrolling through Pinterest. We hate our nine to five jobs. We’re in a cubicle and we want to create life on our own terms. It sounds sexy. Right? Sounds so great. What is stopping you from doing that? Ways of thinking from when you were a child.
Now you may logically be listening to this and be like, you know what, Leah you’re right. I don’t need a paycheck. Every two weeks. I could build a business where I get paid so much that I could be getting paid only monthly, or I could be getting paid every two weeks or I could be getting paid every single freaking day. And I would be just fine. I don’t need those things. You are right. Great. So now you logically know that you have been attaching worth and meaning to something that you don’t actually care about. Now here’s the tricky part and here’s where it really takes a lot of extra effort and work. It’s not enough to just know that you want something to be a way or that you know, that you want to think in a certain way or that, you know, something isn’t actually a value or a truth you, because that will click only in your logical mind, that will click only in your conscious mind that has not yet impacted your subconscious mind.
Your subconscious mind has been thinking this way for decades. And so hearing me on a podcast, or even if you’ve heard this before or thought about it before, it takes a lot longer than just an overnight understanding to actually change your way of thinking, which is another reason that people never create life they want because they throw in the towel. They think that because they’re still afraid of not getting a paycheck every two weeks or afraid of whatever their example is. Therefore it’s scary when in reality, they haven’t even given themselves a chance to learn, to think a different way, or to decide, to choose different values or to make moves in a different direction and allow their minds to keep up. They are frustrated or just oblivious to the fact that because they’re still thinking in a way that they were a month ago or even a few days ago, therefore it is the right way to think. And that is allowing subconscious programming, subconscious thoughts, childhood thoughts to dictate your life. That is not you controlling the life you love.
Okay. I feel like this has been very abstract. So I want to break things down a little bit. I’d love to hear from you guys that are here live. Is this making sense? Do you feel like you want me to go deeper on any one thing, because I know that this can be a little bit wordy and a little bit heavy, but I hope that this is making sense. What I want to break down now is how you can do it then how do you then decide your own values?
Like, here’s a really good example that I want to give you in case, like, in case of real life example would be helpful right now. I just interviewed a woman named Gina yesterday for my podcast. And I have known who she is for years now. She’s super fun and hilarious and Italian. Um, and she is a, um, Oh my gosh. I’m so happy to hear. I’m so happy that this is making sense to you. And she is a, uh, feminine, inspired personal development coach. And she started her business when she was $75,000 in debt. Um, so $75,000, yeah. With student loans and credit card debt and all of that, she was super in debt and she invested like tens of thousands of dollars into her business. And when she, and everything I’m talking about here happened to her. I just talked to her about it on my podcast, happened to her. And actually I kind of a dark, very sad way. She was at a dark part. She, she described it as a dark night of the soul where she was really alone.
Wasn’t talking to family really isolated. So she had no choice, but to create her own set of values, because so often we claim onto the values of our parents, of our churches, all that kind of stuff, because we think that, um, you know, that’s where we get our approval. That’s where our community is from. And she’s like, well, I didn’t have that. So I got to choose my own. So you don’t have to do it that way. But that’s what happened to her. And when she did that, she realized that that debt is a societal value as a bad thing. Again, God is not coming down from the heavens and telling you, your debt is a bad thing, right? He’s just not, um, you are, or your tea or your society is, or your parents are. And listen, this is going to, I’m going to talk about this more in just a second, but just because your parents told you something, I’m not trying to say that that doesn’t mean it is your values.
Like there’s a lot that you can look at from what you’ve learned from your parents, what you’ve learned from your church, what you’ve learned from your elders, what you’ve learned from your community, and think, you know what? I really do love that. That is part of my values, but you get to make that empowered decision instead of by default, just accepting it as fact, without actually looking at who you are in the mirror and who God put you on this earth to be. And so I want to just make that clear that I’m not saying you have to detach from everything you’ve ever been taught, but you have to ask yourself, is this really what I want? So anyway, she talks about how debt was something that made her feel guilty for a really long time. She carried around a lot of shame for it.
Even as she was building her business, she has a multimillion dollar business and she built her business up to the, I think millions before she paid off her debt. Like she was like, my debt is what I paid off last. She didn’t care about it. She didn’t give it any energy. She traveled before she paid off debt. She bought Jimmy Choos before she paid off debt. She did what was within her value system. She’s not promoting debt, I’m obviously not either. I’m not promoting any one value system. That’s the point I’m encouraging you to discover your own. And, um, one thing to understand, as you start doing this kind of exploration, cause sometimes it might be hard to know where to start, where it’s like, where does this even begin to be? Like, what do I like versus what have I been taught as a child that I’m still thinking about?
The three biggest, uh, factors that mold our values forever really as humans, our money, God, and sex, which is why religion is so effective because you are being basically threatened in a sense and I’m Catholic. So I very much believe in religion and, and I’m in no way. You’re trying to say anything negative about religion. I just want us all to have awareness here. There’s a reason that religious teachings are so powerful because if you, if you cross that line and if you’re taught this before your, you know, 10, seven years old, what is at the cost of you going against those values? Hell. Eternity, right? Really scary things. And same thing with your parents when you’re really young. If there’s, if they abandon you, if they feel, if you feel like you’re not receiving the love from them that you want, you feel like you do something wrong and your a child and you can’t function on your own.
That thought like, it feels like either I can form or I die. And this all sounds very dramatic, but you can understand how as a child that is, that’s literally, you’re just trying to survive. That’s kind of like your, your role in this world. And you have to have your parents to do it. You can’t survive on your own when you’re four can survive. Definitely can’t survive on your own when you’re six months old. And so this is why this stuff gets so ingrained in our brains. And this is why it can feel very painful and scary to look at it because it’s like, Oh my God, well, I believe this my whole life. And this has gotten me far in life. And I love these parts of my life. And here’s where I want to get into now, how do we actually rewire it them? How do we actually look at our own values?
I want to give you guys a few practical steps, because at this point I hope you guys are seeing my point here, which is that you might logically know how you want to live your life. You might logically know that you have been living under the values and the rules of other people, and you’re ready to start creating your own. You might logically know that you don’t need to be afraid of a lot of the things that you’re feeling fear of quitting your job, putting yourself out there, spending money, whatever the case may be. Get subconsciously. You don’t, you don’t know that yet. You’re still working with this older set of values that is preventing these two from making sense. And this can be a really complicated tension. This is when guilt comes into play. This is when people feel like they’re doing it wrong because their subconscious and their conscious mind are telling them two different things. So how do we get the gang onboard together? I have a few practical steps for you guys that I have used myself. So let me take a sip of water. Thank you tree. Thank you, Olivia. I’m so glad you guys are enjoying this. Um, yeah. Let me know if you have any questions.
Okay. So step one to literally create life on your own terms, which means your own values. And by the way, you guys, I’m not just saying this to hear myself talk, because I believe so fully in the sexy version of creating life on your own terms, have the money, take the vacations live wherever you want the laptop lifestyle. I’m all about that. And any of you, who’ve worked with me, know that to be true. And the, and I want that for you. Like if that’s, what is, you know, setting your soul on fire, I want that for you. Here’s how you get there. You’re not going to get there by functioning and operating the way you’ve always operated. Otherwise you would have already have been there. You will, you will stay stuck. And so this is kind of like the gateway there. This is all part of my Leah Gervais methodology.
You have to start with the inner to create the outer. So here’s step one to relooking at your own values so that you can set yourself free of values that are not yours, and that do not serve you. One is to look at your values neutrally. So on a very personal note, I resisted doing a lot of this for a long time, even though I knew it would be good for me because I love my parents. And I grew up with who I think are the best parents in the world. And my dad died in the middle of this. You might add, passed away out of the blue skiing, you know, one day, like literally I talked to him on the phone the day before, while he was on a ski lift. The next day I get a call from victim services on the mountain. It was the most tragic, shocking, heartbreaking, horrific thing I hope I ever go through.
And it’s still the darkest part of my life. I will never stop missing him. I’m going to get emotional, but I will never, it will never be okay. Honestly, I don’t, that’s a kind of a, I don’t actually know if that’s the way I want to put it, but it will always hurt. And so to then consider questioning him, questioning what he had taught me, questioning his beliefs, questioning his values, questioning the father he was, was way too painful and not an option. It felt like I was criticizing him. It felt like I was picking apart things he and my mother had chosen to do. I had no interest in doing any of that. I loved my parents through this all I have always had the most supportive parents and I’m very, very close with both of them. So my dad is my guardian angel and business partner and my mom’s my best friend.
So I was not interested at all in going and dissecting what my childhood was like, what they could have done wrong, why their values weren’t helping me anymore. It was not something I wanted to do. It felt too painful. It felt unnecessary. Like, you know, it, I felt like it would’ve made sense if I had a traumatic childhood or an abusive childhood. And I’m very blessed that I did it. So I just couldn’t see the point and I didn’t really even want to go there. And I’d even had some of the similar resistance around the Catholic church. I liked being Catholic. I got married in a Catholic church. You know what? I had a great childhood, um, growing up Catholic. And so these ideas of, of judging, uh, things about what I had learned there criticizing the way I was brought up, thinking about it, being wrong.
We’re just so, so much heavier than I was really looking to do what I didn’t really get for honestly, probably a while. Maybe a year or two ago is that there is no judgment around this work. There’s no judgment around what my parents taught me. There’s no judgment around what the church has taught me, my parents. And I’m guessing your parents, if you’re listening to this gave you the best they had. They give you everything that they had. It is the, one of the things we can be the most grateful for in the world is that our parents gave us their all. And we are all different human beings here with our own unique purpose and experience. God put us here for a reason. And part of that is discovering and pulling back. What makes you, you, it has nothing to do with your parents.
It has nothing to do with the values they taught you. It has nothing to do with those values being good or bad. Those were their journeys. Create your own and honor them by creating your own, like show them what a badass child they have raised because you have the courage and the strength to listen to yourself, to look inward, to not look outward for external validation, to not follow the crowd, to believe in yourself, to be a leader. I can think of a better way to honor your parents. So all this is to say that that’s the first step is start looking at things that you have attached worth to or thought of as inherently true and not question for a while and don’t judge them. Don’t judge. Your parents don’t even judge the value itself. You still might like that value. You just need to actually look at it.
So that’s step one detach any value from it. And then step two is to start thinking about in your day to day life and whenever you want to make a big decision, or if you really want a practical exercise, journal your dream vision for your life in a year, in five years in 10 years, and think about where tension comes up. Are you afraid? This will never happen. Are you afraid that this would mean that you would have to put yourself out there a lot? Are you afraid of spending how much money this could cost you? Are you afraid of failing? Are you afraid of how you would handle as much money as you might want to have? Are you afraid of how you would handle fame? If you want to be famous, right? Whatever kind of tensions come up, you can start unraveling your attachment to those fears right then and there, because inherently we’re only born with two fears, the fear of loud noises and the fear of falling.
So fears of debt, fears of failure, fears of judgment, fears of humiliation, fears of, you know, anything else that come up, they are all learned. They are all learned, which means you cannot learn them, which means you’re afraid, but you have to do this in order to unlearn them. So that’s just, I mean, that alone like changed my life. Just realizing that I thought everyone was afraid of spending money. They’re not, and we don’t have to be either just because a lot of people talk about it doesn’t mean it’s something we actually have to put up with. We’re not born with it. It’s not an actual fear that helps us survive in this world. So why not get rid of it? So that’s step two is start getting intimate with the fears you have and notice what words have I attached to my fears that isn’t actually something that I deem as worthy.
Okay. The next thing is to celebrate awareness. I’m not kidding here. Any of you guys who have been in my programs like that, I probably more or less make you guys celebrate, like have a glass of champagne when you do any seemingly small thing, but awareness around “Oh my God I just had a light bulb moment that this is something that I actually don’t need in my life”. I don’t need to get paid every two weeks. I don’t actually care if, uh, I get paid every two weeks. It literally doesn’t matter. Right? Like you just have the awareness of that. You can say, you know what I do like getting paid every two weeks. I do like having a stable paycheck. I do like knowing where money’s coming from, those are then your values. You know, I value, um, I value consistent income. I value having different sources of income, but a two week paycheck, I couldn’t care less about, right?
That is an awareness that is worth celebrating. Now, as I said, it doesn’t mean you’re going to wake up tomorrow and never care about getting paid every two weeks again, or never have any fear about that. But once you have the awareness, that connection between what your logical conscious mind knows and what your subconscious out of your control mind knows starts to form. And this is how you rewire things that you have believed for literally decades, literally your entire life, which is what has kept you stuck up into certain parts of your life at this point. So celebrate the awareness, have champagne about the awareness by yourself. Crap because of the awareness. I’m not kidding, like dwell on the awareness.
And that brings me to step four, afirm the awareness. So, you know, you’ll hear a lot. This is kind of what I was talking about at the beginning, how I feel like a lot of people don’t talk about this and it’s not because I think that they don’t want to, or that they’re trying to hide it.
I think a lot of people don’t understand it fully. You hear a lot of people talk about the importance of affirmations or the importance of gratitude journals and just mindfulness in general. And I obviously believe in all of that, but think about how much better affirmations could work if you actually knew what you were affirming. So we’re going to use this example here. Uh, if someone tells you have affirmations everyday saying, I, um, I’m rich, right? If money is something that you’re trying to think differently about, and someone just says, have an affirmation every day that says I have money, I’m rich. I have money I’m rich that will help repetition does help rewire your mind. And so that is a strength, but think about how much stronger it be. If you were able to really look at this and think, okay, I’m afraid of quitting my nine to five job because I grew up with parents who had stable paychecks every two weeks. And that was how my family functioned. And that is how my family was able to survive. And so I associate two week or every two week paychecks with survival and with family.
Wow. Right. Then your affirmations can become, because I work for myself and I receive money whenever, I will thrive and my family will be safe. Right. Then you’re really getting to the root. That was kind of a long affirmation. But do you see the difference here then you’re affirming the opposite of the value that has been holding you back then, you agree creating your own set of values, then you’re living life on your terms. So start thinking about it. And I just want you guys to know that, um, this might sound like kind of a lot of work. It might be like, where do I start? And my literally trying to re-unravel everything and you know, this is still stuff I do all the time.
So I did it early on in my business, uh, around then, early on in my business, the things I had to relearn, probably the biggest word debt was a big one and I, I can be transparent. So I’m very transparent that I, um, for my very first two business expenses, I put them on a credit card. I didn’t have the money. It was freaking scary and I didn’t pay them off on time. And I paid interest. All my fears came true and I’m here to tell the tale, right. It was okay. I joined a program and then I joined a VIP track or like an extra support track with it, put it all on a credit card, cried at night, whole nine yards, best financial decision I could’ve made right? Now, looking forward I now have my business and obviously I’m at a different place than I ever could have been if I would not have gone all in, in that way.
And I will say another thing is that I remember thinking once I started making money, I would pay off my student loans right away. Cause I had student loans after going to school. That was just what I assumed. I had always thought like, Oh yes. Once I make it side hustle wise, I will pay off my student loans right away. And once I started actually seeing real, like big money coming from my side hustle, what felt to me at the time, like big money, I realized that my student loan interest rate, it was pretty low. I think it was like 3% or something. And so the amount of like the amount of financial sense it made to repay that just for the sake of repaying it versus reinvesting it into my business, which was taking off, right. And I was like, my income was like doubling monthly or regularly. That made way more financial sense that would have paid off my student loans right away. When I started, when I had the money to, I would have saved myself probably a few hundred dollars.
But instead I looked at my own value system and realized that this debt, obviously wasn’t hurting me in my life. I survived the, you know, all terrifying credit card debt just fine, paid that off. And um, so my value system was to make the most of my business to make the most of what I had started. And that’s what I decided to do. So my advice here is to start with one thing at a time, start with what you most desire right now. And for those of you in my service based sale program, you can always revisit the desire module. We have a whole module there and look at what’s blocking it and look at what is scaring you about doing it.
Look at what you are not doing to, in order to achieve it. Look at where you’re stopping yourself. Are you stopping yourself because of money? Are you stopping yourself because of what other people think are you stopping yourself? Because a fear of failure and then look at where that came from and start realizing that that’s not your material. That’s not a bag you need to carry anymore. That’s something you can leave behind right now and your life right now. And as you do this, as you get the awareness, drop the judgment, affirm the opposite and get repetitive about how you are deciding to think. Instead, you will break yourself free of the shackles of your mind, of society, of generations, of people keeping I’m going to get on in the, in the gender area right now. So warning… the generations of people with the agenda of keeping women small.
And honestly it gives me chills because that’s what we’re up against. And that’s why this stuff is scary. And that’s why most people don’t do it. But you are not most people. You have the ability right now to transform this. You have the ability right now to live life on your own terms and created the way you want. So this was a very long explanation for saying my message, which is that you can 100% create life on your own terms. You can live that Instagram picture on the coast of France or, you know, in a Villa over Bora Bora, you can do it all and you can have the money to do it all. And you can have the freedom to do it all. And you can have all of the glamour you want in your life. I will believe. I mean, every fiber in my being believes that.
And if you aren’t willing to do things the way differently than other people do them, it will be very hard for you to do that. And it’s a catch 22. I don’t just mean do things differently when it’s fun, when it’s easy, when it makes sense. When it’s simple, when it’s the way you’ve always done things, I also mean get comfortable doing things the way you’re afraid to, but ask yourself, am I really afraid? Do I actually care about this? Am I actually afraid of this? If we use my example of when I was terrified, putting money on my credit card was probably one of the scariest things I’ve done in my business. Getting on Facebook live has never been that scary for me. I’ll be honest. I’m very lucky. I don’t have that big of a fear of visibility, but a lot of my clients do.
I’ve worked with people through that. The credit card debt was probably one of the scariest things and all my fears around it came true. I didn’t pay it off on time. I had to pay interest on it. And my credit score probably dropped a little bit. And who cares? You’re able to get your credit score back up. I saved more money by learning how to grow my business, taking my finances into my own hands. And now having a multiple six figure business. Then you know, the few hundreds of dollars, if that I had to pay an interest from it, like I actually wasn’t afraid of those things. I thought I had to be afraid of those things. I thought it was irresponsible. If I wasn’t afraid of those things, you know where being afraid of those things kept me? In a nine to five job doing things the way white men were telling me to do them.
So before I get too far on this and people are losing people because they’re like that you have left the reservation. I hope that you guys found this helpful. I hope you see why I care about this. I hope you see that everything you really do want is possible for you and it’s waiting for you. So if you guys liked this episode, DM me @LeahGervais_ , let me know what your favorite part of it was. And I hope it really empowers you to see how much freedom there really is at your fingertips. Even if you’re listening to this from a cubicle, even if you’re listening to this because you know, you, you you’re super lost. Even if you are in debt, even if you are afraid of how to move forward, even if you can’t see it on the other side, you are in a much further along place than you could ever imagine. The power is within you right now. So I hope you guys have an awesome day. Thank you so much for hanging in with me, Olivia, you were at the best. Thank you guys on Instagram as well. Um, yeah, DM me if you guys like this and I will talk to you very soon here is to your biggest vision! Bye everyone.
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